Coping with Life Transitions

A life transition is any kind of change. Whether it's big or small, expected or unexpected, it is something that happens that requires us to adjust. Some transitions are planned, like graduating, getting married, or starting a new job. Others take us by surprise, like an unexpected career shift or a sudden move.

One of the hardest parts of change is that it doesn't always come with a roadmap. You might be stepping away from something familiar - a role that you've had for years, a place that felt like home, or a routine that brought you comfort. The unknown can feel unsettling, and that's completely normal. Life transitions can also challenge our sense of identity. The change might make us feel almost unknown to ourselves even if the life transition was planned. A new mom might feel a sense of grief for her old life as she navigates the demands of motherhood. A recent graduate might find themselves struggling after finishing school since most of their life had been predictable around an academic calendar. An injury might take an athlete off their course and leave them feeling lost. 

These challenges are a part of life transitions however something important to remember is that change is a natural part of life. Even when it's uncomfortable, it can help us grow in ways we never expected. Life transitions can give us a unique opportunity to evaluate our lives and our identity, reflect on our values, and explore how we connect to purpose and meaning.

Especially when life transitions were previously planned or expected, many people wonder, "Why am I struggling so much with this?" But if you're feeling uncertain or overwhelmed, you are not alone. Here is why transitions can affect us so deeply.

• Uncertainty & Anxiety: The unknown can feel scary. It's natural to worry about making the wrong choice or not feeling prepared for what's next. In fact, uncertainty is often a cause of mental distress. You can reflect on those feelings as a reflection of how much you care about the outcome. They're a sign that this transition matters to you. 
• Grief & Loss: Even positive changes can bring a sense of loss. You might grieve the familiarity of your old life, the people you're leaving behind, or even the version of yourself before this transition. Grief is not just about loss. It can show up at any time life shifts in a big way. 
• Personal Growth and Transformation: Here's the thing...Change is hard! But it can really be where the magic happens. Transitions challenge us, and while they may feel uncomfortable, it's also a chance for personal growth, particularly when you have the right supports in place. The truth is, you are more resilient and capable than you even realize. 

So now you may be asking, how can I navigate these tricky times a little more easily? Here are a few things that may help:

1. Be Kind to Yourself: If there's one thing I want you to remember, it's this: Be gentle with yourself. It's ok to feel uncertain, overwhelmed, or even a little lost. You don't have to have it all figured out right now. Give yourself permission to be a work in progress. Try this affirmation: "I am allowed to grow and adjust at my own pace."
2. Lean on your Support Systems: Flexible boundaries are continuously adjusted so that we can protect ourselves while also experiencing growth. Flexible boundaries give us the space to compromise, which can lead to the betterment of ourselves and our relationships.  Having a good support system is an important part of coping with any life change. Your therapist can be an important part of your support system as they have specialized training that can help.
3. Stay Grounded: Some boundaries should be rigid if they defend real safety, security, or our core values (to a limit). These boundaries reflect needs rather than wants. Sometimes, when we have experienced trauma, we tend to have more rigid boundaries. This is okay and serves to protect us from further harm. However, with time and a felt sense of safety and security, we notice those boundaries can often become a bit more flexible. A trained professional can help you identify when a rigid boundary is protective.
4. Take it One Step at a Time: Transitions can feel overwhelming when we try to tackle everything at once. Focus on what you can control today and remind yourself that you don't have to have all the answers right now.

Life transitions are not easy. But they also offer a chance to grow, evolve, and step into something new.

One thing to keep in mind is to gently lean into the discomfort because discomfort is a sign that you're moving through something meaningful. No matter where you are in your journey, you are not alone. Our trained professionals are here to help. Remember, you have the strength to get through this, and on the other side of this transition, you might just find yourself exactly where you need to be.

So, if you're in the middle of a life transition right now, take a deep breath! Take it one day at a time, be kind to yourself, and trust that you are growing in ways that you can't even see yet. You've got this! If you would like support working through a life transition, reach out to us to be matched to a trained professional.